God Has a Few Regrets, Part 11

My Exclusive Interview with God – Doug Bercy for the Swamp Sentinel

(the interview continues over lunch)

God:     Well, this looks good enough to eat.

DB:      Sure does. Should we say grace?

God:     If it makes you feel better, Doug.

DB:      It’s kind of common practice down here, thanking you for food.

God:     Well, thank the chef and Meghan, young man. I can’t make toast.

DB:      I’m not too handy in the kitchen either, G, but the thinking is it’s your benevolence that allows us to have anything to eat at all.

God:     Oh, okay. Then fire away with the blessing. I’m starving over here.

DB:      Would you do the honors?

God:     Aren’t you supposed to be thanking me for this spread?

DB:      Yes, I just thought it would be special if you did it. Besides, my tongue is tied thinking about doing the thanking face to face.

God:     Alright. (God folds his hands together and bows his head) Over the lips and past the gums, look out stomach here it comes. We good?

DB:      Amen.